Last night we studied James 3:1-12; about taming the tongue. This is something I’ve made a conscious effort to work on – I tend to be either quiet or sarcastic. If it’s a group of people, I am quiet. If there are only one or two, then I make up for the times I don’t talk :-). Regardless, I am very sarcastic. It is ALWAYS in my head, and sometimes the sarcasm makes it out of my mouth. I am often misunderstood, because of these two extremes.

So, while I haven’t memorized this portion of scripture, I am very familiar with it {I stink at memorizing – I get the gist but that is about it}. What was I reminded of last night? [v8] No man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil. It is full of deadly poison. It is only by God’s strength in grace can our tongue be controlled. Our tongues can get us into so much trouble. And so quickly!

If you’re not familiar with this portion of scripture it is the part about putting a bit in the mouth of a horse to control such a large animal, rudders on ships being small yet used to steer huge vessels, and the tongue being a small part of the body but it is what sets the tone of each person’s life.

5] Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark.

6] The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.

…

8] but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. (James 3:5,6, 8 NIV)

How sobering to think our words are like a spark. A thoughtless or carelessly spoken word can hurt and damage a life, whether a person or a relationship; just as the result of a spark is a fire, sometimes contained – sometimes not. As long as there is oxygen and something to burn a fire does not go out. When one person says something and another repeats it when it wasn’t their place to speak. That is the start. Don’t be one to feed the fire by repeating.

I have often told my children – if it isn’t your news, you don’t need to share it. You know that itchy-to-say-something feeling, that is the restless evil in verse 8. Often that feeling is justified by Christian women by deciding it is the Holy Spirit telling us to say something. Um, no. That is justification for gossip. Just like prayer requests in a group, if it isn’t about you – don’t share it in the name of asking others to pray. Unless, you’ve been specifically asked to by the person requesting prayer.

The Holy Spirit doesn’t give us conviction for someone else. He might convict us to pray for someone else – but NEVER to talk about one person to another. {Note: If you’re concerned about someone’s safety and need to seek wise counsel that is different – and is not what I’m talking about.} If you wouldn’t say it to the person, or they wouldn’t say it to the person you are telling – what makes you think it is your business to say anything?

Have you ever been on the receiving end of someone else’s ‘good’ intentions?

I have and it’s not fun. It is where my conviction to watch the words leaving my mouth came from. This is also part of why I have an issue with facebook. The patterns I see on fb follow the philosophy of it being a platform for unaccountable*, non-thought out, spewing of momentary thought. Regardless of who it is aimed at – everyone reads it, many are hurt or left wondering what you really meant. Besides that I have a problem with feeling like when I post a status update I’m standing up in the middle of a crowd saying “Hey, look at me – I’m talking!”…ya, I’m a dork.

The ironic thing is – even though I desperately don’t want to hurt others with my mouth – it has to be a daily decision, my mouth is not naturally kind. I was reminded again in verse 8 – I can’t tame/control my tongue. I am utterly helpless to be successful. I can’t even fake it. I can only stay in close relationship with Christ and allow Him to work through me and He can stop my mouth because of my willingness.

Can you believe it? Less than a week of 31 Days is left! Today is day 25. I’m also linking up to Royal Daughter Designs for Desire to Inspire.

*I say unaccountable because if you are hurt by something said you are expected to not really believe it because after all – it’s just facebook. There is no time you are not accountable for the words you say.  So why if it is broadcast – in print to who knows how many, not just by a few hearing – on facebook is it not supposed to hurt? {okay, stepping off my soapbox now}

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To some degree this is what I envision the inside of my brain to look like: Tangled thoughts, ideas, visions, choices – all mixed together with mind-numbing snow {fear, indecision} and God’s light shining through. I want others to see God’s light through me and the decisions I make. The big picture is really pretty – I want to imagine God thinks the branches of my life – all the decisions and outcomes – are pretty. Of course, I have ugly sin I make the choice to keep covered by Jesus’ blood and God’s grace. I have to choose to look at the pretty and not focus on the sin. He has provided the opportunity, I just have to choose to accept it. It’s a gift already there, provided for each of us.

[13-16] Do you want to be counted wise, to build a reputation for wisdom? Here’s what you do: Live well, live wisely, live humbly. It’s the way you live, not the way you talk, that counts. Mean-spirited ambition isn’t wisdom. Boasting that you are wise isn’t wisdom. Twisting the truth to make yourselves sound wise isn’t wisdom. It’s the furthest thing from wisdom—it’s animal cunning, devilish conniving. Whenever you’re trying to look better than others or get the better of others, things fall apart and everyone ends up at the others’ throats.

[17-18] Real wisdom, God’s wisdom, begins with a holy life and is characterized by getting along with others. It is gentle and reasonable, overflowing with mercy and blessings, not hot one day and cold the next, not two-faced. You can develop a healthy, robust community that lives right with God and enjoy its results only if you do the hard work of getting along with each other, treating each other with dignity and honor. [James 3:13-18, The Message – emphasis mine]

Today I’m keeping it really simple – picture and scripture. My mind is pondering lots and I’m off to sew.

I chose to write my series about 31 Days of Life. Today is day 29 of the 31 Days series.

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Easter. What an amazing act of love from our Heavenly Father to us.

Here is a story related in my Bible Study this morning. (quotes from Max Lucado’s Bible Study, Experiencing the Heart of Jesus)

… since God is more moved by our hurt than our eloquence, he responded. That’s what fathers do.

…

That’s exactly what Jim Redmond did.
His son, Derek, a twenty-six-year-old Briton, was favored to win the four-hundred-meter race in the 1992 Barcelona Olympics. Halfway into his semifinal heat, a fiery pain seared through his right leg. He crumpled to the track with a torn hamstring.
As the medical attendants were approaching, Redmond fought to his feet. “It was animal instinct,” he would later say. He set out hopping, pushing away the coaches in a crazed attempt to finish the race.
When he reached the stretch, a big man pushed through the crowd. He was wearing a t-shirt that read “Have you hugged your child today?” and a hat that challenged, “Just Do It.” The man was Jim Redmond, Derek’s father.
“You don’t have to do this,” he told his weeping son.
“Yes, I do,” Derek declared.
“Well, then, ” said Jim, “we’re going to finish this together.”
And they did. Jim wrapped Derek’s arm around his shoulder and helped him hobble to the finish line. Fighting off security men, the son’s head sometimes buried in the father’s shoulder, they stayed in Derek’s lane to the end.
The crowd clapped, then stood, then cheered, and then wept as the father and son finished the race.
What made the father do it? What made the father leave the stands to meet his son on the track? Was it the strength of his child? No, it was the pain of his child. His son was hurt and fighting to complete the race. So the father came to help him finish.
God does the same. Our prayers may be awkward. Our attempts may be feeble. But since the power of prayer is in the one who hears it and not the one who says it, our prayers do make a difference.

This made me think of things I’ve heard before, but for whatever reason clicked more with reading it this morning, Easter morning. If we as human parents will do anything for our children, often without really thinking about it & definitely defending our actions – How much more our Heavenly Father does for us & will do for us. He sent His Son to die on the cross, you know He wanted to spare Jesus – but it was for us He didn’t. His plan was to raise Jesus from the dead, also for us. If God were into the easier way of doing things He could have skipped Jesus’ pain, suffering & dying, but because the wages of sin is death He didn’t. Again, for us.

This weekend was very full of activities at the end of a full week and full of so many blessings. Two very special blessings I don’t want to ever forget…

One very special blessing – I wasn’t exactly sure what I was going to have Vince do while Christine & I were at the Mother/Daughter Tea on Saturday morning….but at the Good Friday Service on Fri night a very special friend’s husband invited him to join him & his son to go out on the 4-wheeler & look for mud puddles! What more could any boy want?! Vince was so excited! When we got home Fri. night he got all his warm clothes & plastic bags with change of clothes for when they were done & getting back into the van ready for the next morning. On Sat when he was back with me & we’d hooked up with other friends he kept telling them about how much fun it was to go find the mud & puddles and go through them. I think everyone we saw or talked to (whether we knew them or not!) in Jo-Ann’s knew he’d been out on a 4-wheeler. I don’t think he’d ever been out to play on one before. I’m sure my dad & brothers will hear lots about how you can just play on the 4-wheeler, not just use it for work. Dad, this is your warning – :).

This was just funny to me….in the weekly clothes talk of making sure his jeans were clean for Sun morning, Vince informed me that for Easter he wanted to look “just like Uncle Zach”. He was going to wear his jeans, tennis shoes, Carhart sweatshirt & Meekin’s Air Service cap. It was funny ‘cuz he’d actually thought about it & then told me ahead of time. This really isn’t much different than what he’s been living in lately, except the cap. Zach you are missed :)!

The other blessing was Christine’s dress. I don’t really put much effort in a new dress for Easter, if it works – great, if not – no big deal. I do like to have something fun and springy & Easter means it’s OK to start wearing less wintry clothes. I had it in my head I really wanted her to have a polka dot dress or a white eyelet dress for going into summer (I know, summer is still a long ways away – but I’m desperate to see it coming). I saw Gymboree’s polka dot dress & it made my desire stronger…but when it was on sale, they didn’t have the right size. There wasn’t polka dot material (that I liked) at Jo-Ann’s for making one either. Then the white eyelet dress at Target went on sale. However, when Christine tried it on we didn’t like it. It was one of those that was cute on the hangar but not so much on. None of this was specific “shopping for an Easter dress”, just in life as we were out & about. So we decided she’d wear her beautiful “Nutcracker dress”, it’s cream/ivory so it’d be fine. My hesitation was I want it to stay nice for a wedding this summer.

Friends at the Tea…
what fun memories to be had in future years.

So, anyway…Saturday morning was the Mother/Daughter Easter Tea at church. On our way to the Tea a friend called. She had a pink/green polka dot dress her daughter had grown out of & she wondered if Christine would like it for Easter?…and she had it with her & we’d see her at the Tea. I about cried – not because I cared so much about the dress, but because God cares about such insignificant elements in my life. I’m all teary even thinking about it. I mean seriously – CJ had a dress, this wasn’t a need in any shape or form. Not only was it a fun, springy dress, but it has big pink/green polka-dots & it is really cute on!

A dress wasn’t even something I’d specifically prayed for. It just wasn’t that important to me, I desired it but it wasn’t a high priority. If God is willing to answer what I haven’t asked for so perfectly, abundantly, above & beyond – how much more so does He want to answer/give what I do pray about and things/situations that are actually important?! The ending of the above quote: “Our prayers may be awkward. Our attempts may be feeble. But since the power of prayer is in the one who hears it not the one who says it, our prayers do make a difference.”really struck me. Lately I’d lost sight of this, thinking so many of my ‘unanswered’ (I know, this just means right now the answer is ‘wait’) prayers were a result of me not praying right or missing something. It’s not about me. It is about Him. What glorifies & honors Him. His timing is perfect.

Heavenly Father, thank you for being patient with me as I learn & relearn & have to be reminded again – You want what is best for me, for us. Your power is greater than our every need, than my every fear. Your power has already conquered sin and death. Teach me to rest confidently in your strong hands. Help me to rely on your power, even when I do not understand why things are happening. Thank you for caring about insignificant things, the desires of our hearts, even when they could be labeled ‘silly’. Meet me at the point of my greatest weakness with Your perfect power, in Your perfect love. Thank you for sending Jesus to die & rise again for my sins, for forgiving me, so I can spend eternity with You.

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I’m finding myself drawn to pictures with green (and I’m not talking dark green but springy, fresh, yellowy greens) – green dishes, green floors, green chairs, green pillows, green blankets, green curtains… quilts with springy colors & lots of green variations. Yesterday I was working on getting a Creative Memories order in & the colors of paper I was looking at all followed the springy colors – not my normal choices. My latest addiction has been reading quilt/craft blogs, so many quilters are using all these bright colors & I wonder how much my addiction is in looking at all the colors. Of course all these quilters live in states where spring has sprung & I think secretly I’m looking for a glimpse of their yard with green grass & flowers poking up. 🙂

I’m so thankful God doesn’t rate me by the color I emit. A lot of what I’m reading & studying these days has shown & reinforced to me I’m not a very colorful person – I’m the steady, boring, introverted personality (I know, this is no surprise to anyone who knows me!). But, this is the way God made me. I’m thankful the whole world isn’t like me, but I do have my place ‘cuz we can’t all be the colorful ones either, then there wouldn’t be anyone to enjoy the color. I’m learning there are some things in life I don’t have to learn to like, but I do need to learn to not let fear overcome me. I’m so glad God is patient & willing to keep working on me!

I take so much comfort in knowing … “there is nothing I can do to make Him love me more, there is nothing I can do to make Him love me less.” A song, but I don’t remember who sings it. I think it comes from a verse too, but I’m not positive. I will have to check this out, but I need to go to hold a sick kiddo who is now ready to snuggle.

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The last day of my study had a really good illustration that I’m posting here mostly so I can come back & read it at a moments notice without digging thru my notes. This is from Max Lucado, it is a little long but worth reading.

Here is the scene: You and I and a half-dozen other folks are flying across the country in a chartered plane.All of a sudden the engine bursts into flames, and the pilot rushes out of the cockpit.

“We’re going to crash!” he yells. “We’ve got to bail out!”

Good thing he knows where the parachutes are because we don’t. He passes them out, gives us a few pointers, and we stand in line as he throws open the door. The first passenger steps up to the door and shouts over the wind, “Could I make a request?”

“Sure, what is it?”

“Any way I could get a pink parachute?”

The pilot shakes his head in disbelief. “Isn’t it enough that I gave you a parachute at all?” And so the first passenger jumps.

The second steps to the door. “I’m wondering if there is any way you could ensure that I won’t get nauseated during the fall?”

“No, but I can ensure that you will have a parachute for the fall?”

Each of us comes with a request and receives a parachute.

“Please, Captain,” says one, “I am afraid of heights. Would you remove my fear?”

“No”, he replies, “but I’ll give you a parachute.”

Another pleads for a different strategy, “Couldn’t you change the plans? Let’s crash with the plane. We might survive.”

The pilot smiles and says, “You don’t know what you’re asking” and gently shoves the fellow out the door.One passenger wants some goggles, another wants boots, another wants to wait until the plane is closer to the ground.

“You people don’t understand,” the pilot shouts as he “helps” us, one by one. “I’ve given you a parachute; that is enough.”

Only one item is necessary for the jump, and he provides it. He places the strategic tool in our hands. The gift is adequate. But are we content? No. We are restless, anxious, even demanding. …

We, too, ask God to remove the fear or change the plans. He usually answers with a gently shove that leaves us airborne and suspended by his grace.

Truth be known, some of us discover we have a fear of heights when we are dangling above precarious circumstances – suspended by his grace alone. We’d rather have our feet firmly planted on the ground. We want certainty and facts. We feel a need to know all is going to work out the way we planned. In fact, if we can’t be sure of the outcome of our problems, we’d rather not have them at all. Like Paul, we ask God to please make them disappear.

I’m sorry to say I can think of too many examples from my life that could be represented by the excuses listed – especially the “can we change the plan or just wait until we’re closer?” and the fact I want my feet firmly planted, I want the certainty, the facts, I want to know the outcome of my problems. I’m so glad that even though sin separates me from God, and I am not strong enough to remove it nor am I good enough to erase it (Eph 2:8,9) – God is strong enough & good enough. He has already taken care of everything. He sent His Son to die on the cross & rise again for my sins.

While I know that I still don’t get it & most likely won’t ever really get it, that isn’t the point. It isn’t about me getting it or not, it’s what I do with the gift He’s given to me. He’s already provided what I need, His Grace is sufficient whether I remember to hang onto that fact or not. I’m choosing to hang onto & accept His gift of grace.

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