As I said in my last post – I am going to pull many quotes and/or thoughts that are direct quotes from the book, Captivating by John & Stasi Eldredge.  Each week will be one chapter, and I will post the page number where that quote comes from.  All quotes are from the same page until a new page number is noted.  Unless I made a typo, these are all direct quotes.  None of this is my words, simply a list for you.

My hope is you will be curious and intrigued to the point of checking this book out for yourself.

A Woman’s Journey

*      (page 6) …picture the women we hold up as models of femininity in the church.  They are sweet, they are helpful, their hair is coiffed; they are busy, they are disciplined, they are composed, and they are tired.

*      Think about the women you meet at church.  They’re trying to live up to some model of femininity.  What do they “teach” you about being a woman?  What are they saying to us through their lives? 

*      Like we said, you’d have to conclude that a godly woman is …tired.  And guilty. 

*      We’re all living in the shadow of that infamous icon, “The Proverbs 31 Woman,” whose life is so busy I wonder, when does she have time for friendships, for taking walks, or reading good books?

*      Somehow she has sanctified the shame most women live under, biblical proof that yet again we don’t measure up.  Is that supposed to be godly – that sense that you are a failure as a woman?

Unseen, Unsought, and Uncertain

*      I know I am not alone in this nagging sense of failing to measure up, a feeling of not being good enough as a woman.

*      (page 7) …gut feeling of failing at who she is.  I am not enough, and, I am too much at the same time.  Not pretty enough, not disciplined enough.  But too emotional, too needy, too sensitive, too strong, too opinionated, too messy.  The result is Shame, the universal companion of women.  It haunts us, nipping at our heels, feeding on our deepest fear that we will end up abandoned and alone.

*      We feel unseen, even by those who are closest to us.  We feel unsought – that no one has the passion or the courage to pursue us, to get past our messiness to find the woman deep inside.  And we feel uncertain – uncertain what it even means to be a woman; uncertain what it truly means to be feminine; uncertain if we are or ever will be.

*      Aware of our deep failings, we pour contempt on our own hearts for wanting more.

*      But the desires set deep in our hearts seem like a luxury, granted only to those women who get their acts together. 

*      The message … is try harder….

The Heart of a Woman

*      We have missed the heart of a woman.

*      (page 8)  Think about it: God created you as a woman.

*      You are a woman to your soul, to the very core of your being.

*      We think you’ll find that every woman in her heart of hearts longs for three things: to be romanced, to play an irreplaceable role in a great adventure, and to unveil beauty.

To Be Romanced

*      At some core place, maybe deep within, perhaps hidden or buried in her heart, every woman wants to be seen, wanted, and pursued.  We want to be romanced. (page 10)

An Irreplaceable role in a great adventure

*      Before doubt and accusation take hold, most little girls sense that they have a vital role to play; they want to believe there is something in them that is needed and needed desperately. (page 11)

Beauty To Unveil

*      Their young hearts intuitively want to know they are lovely.  Some will ask with words, “Am I lovely?”  Others will simply ask with their eyes. Verbal or not, whether wearing a shimmery dress or covered in mud, all little girls want to know. (page 13)

*      (page 15)  The desire to be beautiful is an ageless longing.

The Heart Of A Man

*      (page 18) …  men long to offer their strength on behalf of a woman.

*      A woman in the presence of a good man, a real man, loves being a woman.

*      His strength allows her feminine heart to flourish.  His pursuit draws out her beauty. 

*      And a man in the presence of a real woman loves being a man.

By Way Of The Heart

*      (page 19) On the surface we are busy and efficient, professional, even.  We are getting by. 

*      On the inside women lose themselves in a fantasy world or in cheap novels, or we give ourselves over to food or some other addiction to numb the ache of our hearts. 

*      But your heart is still there, crying out to be set free, to find the life your desires tell you of.

“That is what we are inviting you to.

Not to learn one more set of standards you fail to meet. 

Not toward a new set of rules to live by and things you ought to do…. 

This book is not about what you ought to do or who you ought to be.

It’s about discovering who you already are, as a woman.”

(page 19)

How about you?  What do you think of this first chapter?  Can you relate to the desires named?

I would really like for you to join into this “book study” via comments.  Please don’t forget the “rules” of this discussion:

• First of all – in order to have a discussion, you will have to post what you think.  Otherwise this will be just me posting interesting thoughts & quotes meaningful to me.  I know I have read many blogs without ever posting.  I understand, really I do.  I have had reason to not want to be “found” by those I’d rather not be sharing intimate parts of my life with.  If this is a concern for you, please email me privately and I will post your comment without identifying information.  
• Secondly, I would imagine just as with anything, we are not all the same. We have come from different circumstances, life experiences, and have different reasons for reading/participating in blogs.  It may be as simple as this book doesn’t touch you in the way it touched me, or might someone else. Let’s all remember to be friendly to each other, extend kindness and be gracious to each other.
• I don’t want to give the impression this is the only way it is, that it is the end all-be all on everything woman.  I’m truly just sharing a book I have found helpful to me in hopes of encouraging you.