The pictures are just for eye candy; they have nothing to do with today’s post. The ferris wheel I believe better depicts our life than a merry-go-round — not just round & round, but up & down too. The main ride [campaign primary] just got over, but we’ve done so many this summer I still feel dizzy. So now we’re working on walking on the solid ground again. The flowers are the same photo because I was having fun with PicMonkey. 😀 These are all iPhone pictures, because I forgot my “real” camera & can’t figure out Instagram…
What does communion mean to you? I am unashamedly going to tell you what it means to me and an experience from this morning I will never forget. In 1 Corinthians 11:24 we are told to “do this in remembrance of me.” The “this” being referred to is communion, an action representing Jesus’ dying on the cross and being raised again three days later.
At our church we usually have communion the first Sunday of each month, to remember the gift of God’s salvation provided for each one of us. The way we usually do communion is to take the elements when they are passed around, then on our own we pray and take communion when we choose – not all at the same moment. Three times a year we have what we call Christ at Center; it is a service when we have the chairs set up in a circle, in the very center is an empty cross and communion is up on tables around the cross. When it is time for communion, we go to the center, take communion, then return to our seat. When we are given the elements of communion we are reminded to “eat/drink this in remembrance of Him”. It is a visual reminder Christ is to be our very center. It is special; I think I speak for most of our church family when I say we all look forward to these three special times of communion.
Despite what communion means to me, I must confess this morning I allowed my sinful heart to begrudge having to be gluten free – to the point, I debated going. {For those who take communion and appreciate what it stands for – I have been taking just the juice as my communion for the last 15 months and I have felt left out in a way.} In “defense” of my not wanting to go – I am tired. Only Christine & I were here. I am exhausted. Life has been insane, I really could have slept until noon — I could probably sleep ’til noon for the next week & still not feel rested. My ears ache & my eye keeps twitching {my body’s signal of being too tired}. By the way, did I mention I am tired? 😀 …
Yes, I could have easily justified not going – however, I knew in my heart there was a much different issue at play.
Fear. {An ugly 4 letter word I am too often paralyzed by.}
Since “going” gluten free I have taken communion once {accidentally, I forgot until the moment right AFTER swallowing} and last month I was glutened by cross-contamination {I didn’t eat it, but there must have been gluten on the edge of the cup}. So, there was more than a little lingering fear I was fighting on top of being exhausted. Have you ever noticed once you start to let your mind go down the slippery slope of irrationality, it’s hard to stop? I told myself a month ago I wasn’t going to be paranoid about taking communion, yet when actually facing the day in the face I was ready to succumb to the paranoia. I admit, there are too many days and circumstances when I have an attitude about being gluten free. This morning was one of those times. All aspects involved – tired, fear, attitude problems …. I made myself go. I decided we were going to go, but not take communion. I just didn’t want to walk to the center to drink a sip of juice – sadly, my heart was not pretty.
As I drove to church, I knew I was too weary to step up & I didn’t want my ugly weakness to keep me from sharing in the joy of our resurrected Lord. I prayed & asked God to meet me where I was. We got to church a bit earlier and went to a different section than normal {I normally get there later & that section is full}. When I looked at the tables with communion in front of me. One of the tables with communion had ‘Gluten Free’ on it. I nearly burst into tears. I had no idea our church had Gluten Free communion. I fought tears through much of worship, and I was overwhelming thankful. I am blessed.
God TOTALLY met me where I was – which was on my butt in the chair, trying to stuff my bad attitude. Mind over matter, right? I was overwhelmed He showed up in such an obvious way. I have been going to this church for nearly 20 years; I have been involved in Bible study, Sunday School, Youth Group, Women’s Ministry. Most of the staff are individuals I could consider friends, or for sure more than acquaintances. Yet, I had NO idea. I will be earlier to church on “Christ at Center” Sunday’s. I will know I will take communion FULLY three times each year. I am so blessed!
Total side note: these pictures are additional blessings. My phone volume button broke & on Friday I had to get it replaced. I thought I’d lost all 540 photos in my phone {I thought all the info was in the sim card – no that is just what makes it connect to the phone company}…but my computer settings were set right & I had actually {totally unknowingly} backed my phone up a half hour before walking out the door. I was able to plug my phone into the computer & everything is just as it was – except now I can hear!